Easter Bunnies, Firemen, & Pirates (Oh, Sh%t)
Or, Political Correctness, run amuck.
Ever since I can remember, my dad has been a fireman. Not a firefighter. A fireman.
I know that it is now politically correct to say firefighter, but I consider myself excluded from that rule. I remember when I was in the first grade and my dad would show up in a fire engine to pick me up; talk about being the cool kid. So, you could say that I was “grandfathered in” and I am allowed to say fireman instead of firefighter.
“So what?” you say.
“What does that have to do with the Easter Bunny?”
Well, some knuckleheads had seen fit to tell us that we have to change the name of the Easter Bunny to . . . well, I don’t know what their alternative title would be and frankly, I really don’t care. Apparently, not everyone celebrates Easter and they feel left out of the whole bunny thing.
Really?
I do not claim any religious affiliation and, surprisingly, I am okay with the bunny’s moniker. Maybe that is because the Easter Bunny, and in fact, Easter, predate Christianity. Another fact, most “Christian Holidays” have roots in pagan rituals. It basically boils down to “can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”
But, I digress.
Leave the Easter Bunny alone.
“And what about the pirates?” you ask.
When was the last time you were at Disneyland? Well, The Pirates of the Caribbean has always been my favorite ride. In case you live on a commune (with electricity and internet access, apparently) this ride takes you on a boat ride into the world of pirates as they sack and pillage (no murder, it is Disney).
At one point in the ride, we witness a “Bride Auction” where pirates can purchase a wife. Next we see the pirates chasing their newly acquired bride around the town. Well, apparently it is not politically correct for pirates to chase woman. The nerve! So, that portion of the ride was subtly changed and food was placed in the hands of the women. So now, the pirates are (wait for it) chasing the food and not the woman. Pirating can make you hungry.
Three words.
They. Are. Pirates.
Oh, and remember the bridal auction? Still there. So, for those of you playing the home game; buying a wife, okay. Chasing your new acquired wife, not okay.
AAAHHHGGGRRR.
People, people, people.
You will never beat us. So, hop in and enjoy the ride.
Ever since I can remember, my dad has been a fireman. Not a firefighter. A fireman.
I know that it is now politically correct to say firefighter, but I consider myself excluded from that rule. I remember when I was in the first grade and my dad would show up in a fire engine to pick me up; talk about being the cool kid. So, you could say that I was “grandfathered in” and I am allowed to say fireman instead of firefighter.
“So what?” you say.
“What does that have to do with the Easter Bunny?”
Well, some knuckleheads had seen fit to tell us that we have to change the name of the Easter Bunny to . . . well, I don’t know what their alternative title would be and frankly, I really don’t care. Apparently, not everyone celebrates Easter and they feel left out of the whole bunny thing.
Really?
I do not claim any religious affiliation and, surprisingly, I am okay with the bunny’s moniker. Maybe that is because the Easter Bunny, and in fact, Easter, predate Christianity. Another fact, most “Christian Holidays” have roots in pagan rituals. It basically boils down to “can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”
But, I digress.
Leave the Easter Bunny alone.
“And what about the pirates?” you ask.
When was the last time you were at Disneyland? Well, The Pirates of the Caribbean has always been my favorite ride. In case you live on a commune (with electricity and internet access, apparently) this ride takes you on a boat ride into the world of pirates as they sack and pillage (no murder, it is Disney).
At one point in the ride, we witness a “Bride Auction” where pirates can purchase a wife. Next we see the pirates chasing their newly acquired bride around the town. Well, apparently it is not politically correct for pirates to chase woman. The nerve! So, that portion of the ride was subtly changed and food was placed in the hands of the women. So now, the pirates are (wait for it) chasing the food and not the woman. Pirating can make you hungry.
Three words.
They. Are. Pirates.
Oh, and remember the bridal auction? Still there. So, for those of you playing the home game; buying a wife, okay. Chasing your new acquired wife, not okay.
AAAHHHGGGRRR.
People, people, people.
You will never beat us. So, hop in and enjoy the ride.
posted by Scott at 1:54 AM
1 Comments:
See, for me I agree that the Easter Bunny=Easter=Christian holiday I don't celebrate, but I've always found that it's the whole point. To know there are people out there that are trying to subtlety change it so I can feel good about celebrating (non) Easter (but everybody knows it's really Easter) too just pisses me off.
You keep your retarded traditions and let me have my own.
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